Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Onward in this journey

Today is day 4 of using my cane or sighted guide full time. So how is it going you ask?

Well I am incredibly uncomfortable both physically and emotionally. It is difficult to make these changes and my back is very tight and sore. My boss told me today that if I need to lay on the floor...just do it. However, I am retraining my brain to believe that the things I do "can't" be done with out assistance of a sighted guide or cane. It is an interesting concept.

I am so grateful for the support of my coworkers. Our doctor is thankful for the impact the use of my cane is having on our office in being more conscious of things happening. A coworker, who does rehab teaching and not O&M, oriented me to my office....I haven't gotten lost yet though we have had a few close calls.

Emotionally, this is a journey. My boss told me I would have days when it would go well and days when I would want to cry and scream and throw things...well they aren't days...they are moments. Yesterday I wanted to cry because I was glued to my chair in fear of not knowing my environment. Today I am mobile through the whole building....with only minimal fear and hesitation.

Talking about this is difficult. Easier with some but not with all. Let the journey continue. It will be interesting to see how NYC goes.

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